


Closer To Home

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Angst, Episode: s01e01 Pilot, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-02-11
Updated: 2006-02-11
Packaged: 2019-05-15 22:33:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14799227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: Toby will take whatever comfort he can get.





	Closer To Home

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

**Closer To Home**

**by:** Jen 

**Character(s):** Toby Ziegler  
**Pairing(s):** Toby/OFC  
**Category(s):** Angst  
**Rating:** ADULT  
**Summary:** Toby will take whatever comfort he can get.  
**Written:** 2005-12-05  


"Just go, go be Josh's little puppet, his savior, his-" The bitterness in Toby's voice was suddenly quieted by Tonia's mouth claiming his. She hoped it said what she couldn't. They backed into the kitchen area, banging up against the wall, which was good because her legs were shaking. 

Her life was with Josh Lyman, the love of her life. But with only a few months with working at the Whitehouse, she had formed a friendship with Toby. An forbidden friendship between them, nothing had been the same between Josh and Toby, since they had gotten into that fight. And Josh hardly could stand it when she was around Toby, let along being his friend, so she had agreed for Josh's sake to stay away from Toby. That was, until she found out about the press scandal with Toby being the cause of it. And now with him possibly being in prison for several years, she couldn't just not say good-bye. Well, that was her intention at first, to say good-bye to him. She had made sure nobody had followed her. Because it was something she had to do, to say good-bye. To see him one last time. But nothing had gone to plan. 

She could see the surprise in his now darkened eyes as he opened his front door and saw her standing there. She saw the loneliness and feeling of abandonment in them. She could feel his eyes following her across the room as she entered the apartment. 

Their silence at first was deafening. Spoke volumes. But it wasn't long before Toby spoke first. 

"Does Josh know your here?" He asked quietly as he walked over to his mini bar and opened up a freshly new bottle of scotch. 

She shook her head. "No. I didn't think I should tell him I was coming here." Tonia replied looking back at his gaze. 

"Why are you here?" He demanded shortly, taking a long sip of his glass of scotch. 

"Shouldn't you be out conquering the world with Josh or something?" 

"Toby." Tonia said, but he ignored her and went on. 

"You ignore me for months, at the request of Josh, and all of a sudden your here on my doorstep, with pending days left of my freedom, and here you are. Why?" He snapped unintentionally. 

"I don't know." 

He bitterly laughed out loud. "Yes, you do. You just wont admit it out in the open." He said arrogantly. 

"Why are you so arrogant?" She demanded, her irritation visibly showing. 

He took another sip of his scotch before answering. "Because I've had much practice in my life." He said sarcastically. 

"Fine. I give up. Whatever." She replies walking to the door. 

Toby slams down his glass on the table which makes her stop in her tracks, centimeters to the door. Her back to him. 

"What do you expect? I called you three times in the last six months, never wanting to bother you, but I needed someone to talk too." 

She doesn't answer him, so he continues his voice loudens. 

"All of my friends can't talk to me, some of them even hate me, Andi certainly wont talk to me now, I lost my job, and I'm going to prison. And of all things, I thought we were friends." Toby yelled. 

"We are..." She stammered, closing her eyes. She felt him move closer behind her. 

He turned her around and that's when she saw it for the first time. Sadness, anger, desperation, all built up in his eyes. On the verge of exploding. She looked up at him with partial guilt in her eyes. 

"I'm sorry Toby." She said honestly. He let go of her arm and pointed swiftly to the door. "Go." He said in a lower tone. A tone she had never heard before, which kind of unnerved her alittle. 

When she didn't move, he glared at her. "Just go. Go be Josh's little puppet, his savior, his-" That was when she cut him off. She couldn't bear to here the anger building in his voice anymore, she couldn't stand it that she couldn't help him. Didn't know exactly how to help him. So she did the only thing she knew that might stop his hurting for at least for a few minutes. She kissed him. They had backed into Toby's kitchen, banging up against the wall. Her whole body was shaking with nervousness. She was actually alittle surprised at his response to her kiss. There was only two layers of clothes between them. And their hands slide over leather and cotton with clutching fingers. He found her breast with one hand and with one smooth echoing movement surged against her so urgently that she arched one leg around his legs without even being aware of it. 

His hand dropped from her breast to the waistband of her skirt, and he pulled back from the kiss, watching her as his hand slid past her belly button, till they both gasped. 

Her hands clenched around his neck, she couldn't even look away from his eyes. He pressed his forehead to hers, and thrust his mouth against hers again. He pulled back and she realized he was holding his breathe as she was. She was alert to only two things, his face and what he was doing to her. 

"Tell me you want me to stop, and I will." Toby said tilting her face. To see if he could see any doubts in her facial expression. But he saw none. 

Thoughts of Josh came into her mind, but she pushed it back the moment they arose. Maybe it wasn't right, they both knew it, but it was something that needed to be done. Something that had to be done. It was the only way either of them knew how to say good-bye to eachother. 

In response she slid her hands over his chest, and with a boldness she'd never felt before, slid her hands to his crotch and caressed the straining bulge there almost abashedly. He gasped back from her mouth, and opened and closed his mouth with a shudder. His eyes were huge, and his entire body shook against her. 

She felt him pull down his zipper, he gave her one long look before they continued. Almost as if he was giving her an option out if wanted. It made her feel good that he would still even where they were now, still want to protect her. 

She gave him a quiet smile, and he knew she was ready. The lines were already crossed, and both knew if they did this, there was no going back. 

Then he pressed his erection against her and found her entrance with a long explosive sigh. She grabbed his hips to pull him closer, her eyes locked with his, biting her lip to keep from making anymore noise, which resolve lasted precisely as long as it took him to begin thrusting, faster, and faster. She could feel her muscles tightening, knew she was getting close, and looked up at him, gasping. 

"Look at me. Look at me..." She whimpered. 

She knew that he felt guilty, for it happening like this. But that was the last thing she wanted him to feel. She wanted him to feel, anything but guilt, and sadness. 

She could only hear the creak of the table she was partially laying on. The noises they made, the noises there bodies made, and it was too much for her to hang on any longer. Her climax sent him over the edge as well. And he held her face in his hands as his eyes squeezed shut almost in pain and he jerked against her. Everything had been fast before this, now everything was going exquisitely slow. 

When it was over, it was quiet, the room had become incredibly still. Both of them knowing the awkwardness of the situation had become. 

As she got dressed and headed for the door. She could feel his eyes on her, but neither said a word. 

As she turned the knob, she turned to him, almost laughing at the absurdity of the whole thing. "Thanks." She said glancing at him. 

He looked at her with admiration and forced a smile. "Yeah." He said with a hint of amusement in his voice. They looked at eachother for a minute, their eyes locked, before she went out the door. 

He knew it was the last time he would see her. She had given him what he needed at that moment, and even if it was only for a moment, what they had shared, the loneliness he felt was subsided, even if it was just this one time. He loved her for that. 

The End. (I think) 


End file.
